5 Books to Kickstart Your Mindfulness Journey in 2020

4 min read

Sometimes… we get in our own way.

Have you ever had a tough meeting?

One where you give a presentation, layout all the supporting evidence, and have your ideas trounced on without a second thought.

Afterwards, you get a call from your spouse asking the usual questions,

“What do you want for dinner?” or “Why is my car making a funny noise?”

You, still steaming from the meeting, proceed to answer in a short and cold tone,

“I don’t know. Can’t you figure that out?”

Now you’ve upset your partner, and you’re going to have to correct it when you get home.

This could have been avoided if you learned to detach and self-assess at the appropriate times.

Why You Need to Detach

When we detach we are separating our emotions, a damaged ego, from our rational mind. As leaders in our homes, offices, and communities we need to push toward our goals without tearing out teams apart. By momentarily pausing our needs, we can effectively offer better long term solutions.

Thank God you don’t have to learn everything the hard way. Make it easier by using someone else’s experience.  

Grab a book.

Today, I would like to share with you 5 books that taught me to detach and evaluate the world as it is rather than as it should be.

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1. Stumbling on Happiness, Daniel Gilbert

Daniel Gilbert’s book provides great examples of how humans are the only animal that thinks about the future. There’s no harm in pondering the future, but we are terrible at predicting our feelings.

When I read this book, I was hoping to find a secret to happiness. I didn’t find it.

I found out how to evaluate the conditions for happiness. To figure it out, you need to do the following:

Ask someone, who is currently where you want to be, about their emotions. Note all of their feelings (positive, negative, and even neutral).

Your experience in the future will be similar to your friend’s emotions. Don’t expect to have unique outcomes among similar experiences.

2. Extreme Ownership, Jocko Wilink

Jocko explains how to lead and win when all your plans go to shit. Extreme Ownership identifies the steps necessary to master yourself and lead a team.

My favorite takeaways from the book are:

• Check Your Ego
• Keep it Simple
• Be Decisive Despite Uncertainty

Taking ownership of everything in your life is hard because you can no longer blame anyone else. However, taking ownership is what you MUST do to achieve the outcomes you want.

Some of the recommendations can come across as extreme, but Jocko corrects this in his second book Dichotomy of Leadership.

There’s nothing extreme about extreme ownership. You can lead a team and win without being an asshole.

3. Lost Connections, Johann Hari

I didn’t understand the systematic causes of depression until I read Johann Hari’s book.

If you work in corporate America and you’ve been told you have a bad attitude or feel like you have to hide your negative emotions.  This book will explain how the game is rigged to exploit the worker.

The invention of the corporate system destroyed the natural way social groups work. Instead of small cooperative communities, we now work in authoritarian corporate armies that absorb productivity but deny protection.

These conditions can lead to a range of negative effects on mental health.

But, all is not lost.

The good news is that with proper intervention individuals can regain the healthy connections that were lost.

4. The Infinite Game, Simon Sinek

I didn’t understand anything about game theory before reading this book, and I’m still not an expert.

Simon taught me that the infinite game is counterintuitive. In today’s culture, we reward Winners. But it’s hard to declare winners in business because the players don’t agree on the rules.

In this environment, adopting an infinite mindset is the only way to Win.

Understanding this mindset helped me to modify my own thinking about work-life balance.

I thought I could make my boss happy, climb the corporate ladder, and rule the world. Maybe I could achieve some Utopian status.

I was wrong.

You have to play a game, as if it will never stop. Because the game doesn’t stop.

5. Can’t Hurt Me, David Goggins

Goggins!

That’s all you need to know about this book.

Goggins ran on two broken legs during his 3^rd attempt at BUDS training. He ultimately became a Navy Seal, Army Ranger, and Air Force Tactical Air Controller.

David Goggins did some extraordinary things to master his mind. He learned how to trick himself to perform when he didn’t want to. He accomplished this with the cookie jar.

The cookie jar is a mental collection of all the hard things you’ve overcome in your life. When adversity comes knocking at your door. You go into the cookie jar. Remind yourself of who you are, and make shit happen!

Conclusion

You don’t have to be a yogi or zen master to practice mindfulness. There are opportunities every day to calm the noise and focus. You have to learn how to control your mind, so it doesn’t control you.

Get these 5 books.

Life is never as bad as you think, and it’s never as good.

It just is.